Enhancing Relationships at Work

B.C. 2020 (Before COVID in 2020), the physical workplace served as a place of belonging and as a professional family.

We shared the same space with our colleagues, worked together toward common goals, grabbed lunch together, and laughed over private jokes unique to the company culture that united us.

In other words, we bonded. And in the best of circumstances, we made the kind of friendships that last a lifetime.

The pandemic and the recent surge of Omicron have changed much of that. While many still work on-site, the increase in remote work and the Great Resignation have significantly altered the work relationships we once held dear.

Nowadays, colleagues are often digital avatars, and couches are corporate headquarters. And while we may love the flexibility of working from home, we also miss socializing in person with our colleagues.

Having friends at work makes life – both on and off the job – far more fun and enjoyable. It also makes work more fulfilling.

Gallup discovered that work friendships increase employee fulfillment by 50%. What’s more, employees who have a BFF at work are seven times more likely to be engaged on the job.

The future of the workplace is still in flux, but many believe the hybrid model of working from home at least part of the time is here to stay.

That raises an important question: How can we enhance relationships at work while toiling away remotely or seeing colleagues sporadically?

While mindfulness isn’t a magic wand, particularly for external circumstances we can’t always alter; it can help us navigate our internal reactions to the changing nature of our work relationships with greater ease. It also grants us more awareness to know if we’re craving more connection or if we’re lonely.

If either is the case, here are some ways mindfulness can help us enhance our work relationships and take steps to create more connection and friendship – whether we’re working from home or rubbing elbows with colleagues at the office.

• Knowing What You Need:  Many years ago, a friend of mine was in a slump and decided to write down everything that made her happy. When she looked at the list, she realized she wasn’t doing a single one of them – including socializing with friends. Sometimes, we can forget what makes us feel fulfilled and connected. Mindfulness helps us attune to our needs for friendship, motivating us to invest in our relationships at work intentionally. As we sit in meditation, we can notice if pangs of longing or feelings of disconnection arise within us. We also can notice how spending time with our work friends makes us feel. After a connected conversation with a colleague, do you feel a bit more cheerful? Do you notice warmth in your chest or a lift in your step? If so, the wisdom of your body is telling you more of that is a good thing.   
• Making Time to Socialize in New and Novel Ways: Nitin Nohria, the former dean of Harvard Business School, recently suggested in a Wall Street Journal article that we re-envision the physical, post-pandemic workplace as a clubhouse where colleagues gather to socialize and collaborate and use the home office as a place for concentrated work tasks. It’s not a bad idea. It will take time to shift attitudes about the purpose of the modern workplace. But in the meantime, we can borrow Nohria’s clubhouse concept. We can set aside time, for example, to have virtual lunches with friends at work once a week or, if colleagues are in the same geographical location, we can make time to meet in person for coffee. We can also use old-fashioned technology to connect. How about calling a colleague just to chat about life?
• Expressing Gratitude and Appreciation: Gratitude is often called a “social glue.” Research shows that gratitude helps us initiate, maintain and strengthen relationships. Another benefit is that expressing gratitude can make us feel more invested in our friendships. We can create greater connections with our colleagues, even remotely, by expressing gratitude for them whenever we exchange an email or text. We can also express appreciation for something specific a colleague has done or contributed to the team during a Zoom meeting, fostering closeness and community.  

Written by Kelly Barron